Here’s a book for those experiencing trouble with your teenage children. Besides being a licensed counselor, Ms. Rae has experienced her own deep trouble with a teenage child of her own. That will color your opinion of the book. You will either think that you would rather listen to someone who raised teenagers and dodged disaster, or you might think she has insight into how to make the best out of the disaster. Probably you would find another book better if you haven’t had the tragedy yet of a rebellious child, but have you traveled that valley, this book might help you make the most of a tragic situation. Fortunately, after 6 years, Ms. Rae saw her son turn his situation around.
This is not a Scriptural analysis of the problem, but keen insights are given. It had the feel of observations gained by deep experience both professionally and personally. At least if you have a troubled teen and are dealing with guilt, you will obviously be treated gently here.
Her descriptions of parenting styles will help you peg yourself, particularly the likely problems of your style and how it could contribute to rebellion in your child. Then there’s a plea to believe it’s not too late to make changes. That chapter ends, as each of them do, with a set of practical ideas you could try.
Then she guides through the changes that go on at this time in our teenager’s lives. We often, in my opinion, get caught in a time warp and forget that natural changes come at this time of all our lives. To forget that could put us in the hole from the beginning.
The chapter “Moms and Dads, Husbands and Wives” was the best in the book. We expect our children will do well, so if trouble comes, we follow that dark quirk of human nature to play the blame game. Our shame and guilt are hard to hide, so it would be some relief, we suppose, to lay the greater share of blame at our spouse’s feet. That will only compound the problem that is breaking our hearts. She suggests we focus on the marriage at this crucial time and make it strong enough to influence our child.
She well shows that what teens want is little different than what we want. We want to be accepted and loved. These basic human needs rarely vary though the viewpoint of our different age groups may cause far different ideas about getting it. Later she talks about the generational differences we have with teens today. They live near grandparents and cousins, a naturally supportive group, in far less numbers today. Social media replaces that for the most part and makes peers a greater influence than ever. The chapter on “Kids need something to do” is on target.
I thought she was too accepting of certain social ills facing teens today. I wonder if we couldn’t take a stronger stand on issues and balance it with greater love. She highlights communication though fully admitting it is work when teens are involved. Still, help can be gleaned in this helpful book if your teen is troubled today.
I received this book free from the publisher. I was not required to write a positive review. The opinions I have expressed are my own. I am disclosing this in accordance with the Federal Trade Commission’s 16 CFR, Part 255 .