Are you out of gas? Is your tank dry? Yet the road ahead of you goes out beyond the farthest horizon? While this could happen to anyone, what about if you are in the ministry? You are slowing down while the need in God’s work is ever growing. I am now convinced that this is a common problem, perhaps inevitable for those of us who want to give our all.

I’ve read, I’ve studied, and for a season of last year, I felt it! My love of the ministry never wavered. I never stopped loving preaching passionately, yet I felt a weariness. I didn’t quite understand it. I never stopped, but the engine wasn’t running as well. My gentle Lord worked in a variety of ways to help me. He is faithful! 

Among those things He used was this book, Leading On Empty by Wayne Cordeiro. It was during a conversation with a friend  where we were each throwing out book titles that we had read or heard about, that he mentioned this book. Strangely, I didn’t even think I needed the book at the time but was intrigued when he said he had heard of some prominent pastors who were rescued to some degree by this book.

Frankly, I’m not ashamed to speak of this in my life. If far better men than me have faced it, why shouldn’t I? Life has taught me, anyway, that I am far from the strongest person. I see more clearly than ever that I am just going along, held in His hands, and living on His grace. Because of that grace, we need not live on and on with an empty tank.

So I can review this book on more than a theoretical level. Sometimes a book is worth three times more at a certain season of your life than at any other. It might not be your need at this time. On the other hand, it might be soon. I recommend every pastor, and really any leader, have this book on the shelf. For perspective,  I read over half of this book at a tough time for me, and then read the other half later when things were so much better for me. I can recommend it from both angles.

Mr. Cordeiro, a pastor of a thriving, large church, hit bottom. He simply had nothing left to give. He tells his story –warts and all. But as you read, you know he writes with a distinct measure of authority.  He shows how at times Elijah, Moses, Jeremiah, and David lived this too. “Burnout”, being overwhelmed, or out of gas–call it what you will, but it is a real danger, particularly for pastors. As easy as pastoring looks to many, the weight of souls is a load like no other.

He shows statistics for how widely pervasive this issue really is among pastors. He explains the concept of strength being perfected in weakness. He shows how the long-term stress of this leads to depression. He shows how people like Spurgeon suffered here. He sounds the alarm of early warning signs.

His biggest suggestion is solitary refinement– stopping, listening, being quiet. He suggests we divide our lives into what only we can do versus what others can do. We often work where others could while neglecting that 5% that only we can do. My personal life, my family, my Bible time–here are things that only I can do.

His chapter on “Finding the Still Waters” is on target. He also wants us to remove the stigma that is so often put on rest. Our resources of physical strength are obviously limited so we must carefully develop a strategy. Rest, he says, is not a sin, but a responsibility. We see the principle in the weekly Sabbath and in the land resting every 7 years in ancient Israel.

He focuses on being in our Bible and shares this acronym to get more:

SOAP

S = Scripture

O= Observation

A = Application (Never stop without it)

P = Prayer

He pushes taking a sabbatical. That is a little beyond most of us financially, and he finally confesses it. Still, work refreshment into your life. His idea of a Personal Retreat Day is worthwhile too. The last few chapters focus on these kinds of practical things.

This book can make a difference.

Every so often there is a certain kind of book that I simply must read. Books that encourage, inspire, and get my head back on straight. I’m not the only one who has it difficult at times. I’m not the only one who suffers obstacles in my service of Christ either.

In recent days, a good friend of our family asked me about books she might read in the coming year to encourage her in her walk of faith. Then a college friend of my wife wrote asking about books that might help someone she loved who had faced hardship while trying to serve the Lord. I’d like to recommend 5 books that have meant the very most to me in this way. They all are true stories of what happened in especially tough times, times that make my bad times look a little puny. These books help get my head back on straight and remind me of what a wonderful Savior I serve. Here in random order:

1. Evidence Not Seen by Darlene Deibler Rose

Ms. Rose was serving the Lord as a newlywed missionary in New Guinea when the Japanese invaded. Her and her husband were taken to different POW camps and finally she lost contact of what happened to him. Her sufferings were horrific, but her faith was incredible. There were moments where turning on a God you couldn’t figure out for the moment would have been so easy and tempting, but she choose the path of following God when the results weren’t too positive. The warden of the POW camp was as awful as the worst villain in any novel. Wait to you read what happened to him! Powerful!

2. When Iron Gates Yield by Geoffrey T. Bull

Mr. Bull was in China serving as a missionary when the Communists moved in. Things were going so well and then it all fell apart. He found himself incarcerated and down at times. He is real in what he felt and tells us so, yet we find His God is real. The Lord made Himself known in ways large and small. When one need would be met, another would quickly arise. Any old book by Mr. Bull will be worth your while. If you are as blessed by Mr. Bull as I am, you can also look for Tibetan Tales. That was the time before the Communists took over and he was a young man working in the fascinating area of Tibet.

3. Shadow Of Death by Lilli Schultze

A family tries to escape Europe as the Nazis took over. The Lord brought them through step by step, terror by terror. This family faced one of life’s greatest trials–seeing your family in danger and not having the power to stop it. The way they consistently turned to the Lord is extraordinary!

4. Green Leaf In Drought Time by Isobel Kuhn

 Mrs. Kuhn, a missionary herself tells the story of the Arthur Mathews family as they faced difficult missionary work and then had to flee China. The story is that it was literally one frustrating obstacle after another.  At times it seemed that the Lord had deserted them. They kept on trusting though they had feelings as we all would. The title is taken from Jeremiah 17:8. One of the best! Kuhn is a great writer. Look also for her biography By Searching which is also well worth your time reading.

5. The Autobiography of John Paton

Perhaps the best biography I’ve ever read! It is hard to fathom following the Lord with all he faced among the cannibals in the South Seas Islands. He had a thousand opportunities to quit serving the Lord and never did. When he had to guard the grave of his wife to keep the natives from digging up her body to eat it, you feel like quitting for him. He was betrayed often, his work collapsed over and over, and good results were elusive for such a long time. Finally, he perseveres to see the Lord honor him. Your faith will soar reading this book! Probably any biography of him would be good.

Look for a beautiful hardback edition published by Vision Forum (and now out of print) and re-titled Missionary Patriarch: The True Story Of John G. Paton that sold for around $20 (I saw cheaper used copies online). It would make a nice present or a family keepsake.

We need these type of books.

Obstacles are part of life. Frustrations abound in the Christian life. You and I are not alone. One thing I’ve definitely learned over the years of reading these books is that everyone who really served God in a meaningful way suffered hardship, often great hardship. Instead of thinking that God is just picking on me, I should realize that He is picking me out for something special.

Let’s read, remember, and press on to the finish line.

(Some of these books are in print, but also look on used book sites. Search Amazon, Ebay, and Christian Book Distributors. Happy hunting.)

I knew the ministry was tough. Figured that out the hard way. I still love it and want to do it the rest of my life. I thank God for it, but it’s tough. This book (Dangerous Calling by Paul David Tripp) was like the ultimate gut check for me. Funny thing was that unlike what I’ve been tempted to think so many other times, the culprit of my pain was me. The biggest source of my failures? You guessed it–me.

There is hope in this, however, because in a world of things I can’t change, with Christ’s help, I can change me.

Before I tell the themes that spoke to me in this book, I must stop and thank Mr. Tripp for his transparency. Some authors throw in a watered-down criticism of themselves that is really just to show you how wonderful they are in their realness. That is simply not the case here. He takes chapter one to tell where he was at one time in his ministry. Frankly, he was an unspiritual jerk. He held little back in the telling of the story.

Why is that so helpful? Because in some details I could see myself. He spoke of how his “inner lawyer” always came out to defend him. He acknowledged that he was more or less deceived. Am I the only one who finds his discernment runs at such a lower level when the subject is me?

He takes us to task for letting the ministry define our identity. Before I am Jimmy the pastor, or Jimmy the blog writer, I am Jimmy the man. That Christian with varying levels of spirituality, that man utterly needy of Christ, that is who I am. I need to shed the illusions of grandeur where the ministry has elevated me to think something beyond who I really am.

He said: “No one is more influential in your life than you are, because no one talks to you more than you do.” I assure you I am quite the chatterbox in this area. My mind never stops! In all that talking he says “you preach to yourself an anti-gospel of your own righteousness, power, and wisdom, or you preach to yourself the true gospel of deep spiritual need and sufficient grace.” He says we quit thinking of ourselves as a needy child of God and see ourselves as the PASTOR! As if there were some special category! Later in the book he says of we in the ministry: “We are still a mess.” He talks about the fact that we are still in the middle of our sanctification. We know this is true of Mr. Tripp and Mr. Jimmy Reagan. I’m in the middle of my sanctification and still have such a way to go. What about you my pastor friends and acquaintances?

He tackles other issues. My equating my Bible knowledge with spiritual maturity. Ouch! Or how about confusing numbers with success and then riding that roller coaster? He talks about how we think we have arrived and listen to no one. He talks about the ministry overtaking my personal devotions and worship of God, and about how I will lose my awe of my Almighty God. I can walk among the treasures of the Word of God and prepare sermons and never see the sparkle of the gold.

He explains that when I go this way I am in danger of things that I would never want to do. I start separating my private and public self. I can preach against something and turn around and do it–of course anyone could do it, but my problem might be how blind I can be to how serious it is. I can too become completely ensnared by the fear of man. I preach, I speak, I lead just to gain the praise of those who haven’t figured out how wonderful I am yet. Sadly, I no longer act for the approval of One.

All of this will lead to living for self-glory. In that all of us deal with pride, this is a real and present danger. This becomes the gasoline the Enemy throws on the fire of my life to burn up what I could do for the One Whom I love, the One Who gave His all for me.

There’s more. Don’t think I gave you a good enough rundown that you don’t need this book. I need this book. I suspect all of us in the ministry desperately need this book. I’ll recommend it too for pastor’s wives to understand their husbands, and, in that your husband’s call has become yours, you ladies too could fall victim to your own hearts as well. Church members, learn here how to pray for your pastor, learn how to love him, but bring him back down to earth. You might want to give him this book as a gift saying you just heard other pastors saying it helped and blessed them. (That’s true, you heard it from this pastor).

I thank the Lord for this book, for what it means to me, and pray I allow the Holy Spirit to use it on me in the days ahead.